OOCness
by TheAlmightyMoi
Summary: I think the title of this fic explains everything. RnR please. Finally finished. Written by Moi.
1. Of meaniepies and a raise

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing. NOTHING!

OOCness

Chap 1: A Raise.

Holly was in her office playing Barbie dolls with Lili Frond when her communicator rang. "Yay my phones winging!" she squealed. "I'm so excited." Holly answered her communicator.

"Hello Holly wolly," Artemis yelled.

"OMG Arty Warty, it's you," Holly squealed. "I missed you so much!"

"Holly wolly, guess what."

"What?"

"I'm having a GWEAT BIG BIRTHDAY PARTY!"

"Oh WOW! Can I come?"

"Sure you can. But Butler wutler might not party with us."

"Why not?"

"He was hugging his kitty when he hugged it too hard and his kitty scratched his hand and ran off. First he was calling his kitty a meanie pie but then he saw the blood and now he's vomiting in the toilet."

"Awww, poor Butler wutler. I'll come over straight away for the party."

"Ok, Holly wolly, see you soon."

"See you Arty warty."

Holly hung up and ran off to catch a shuttle to Tara when, "Holly," Root whispered, "Where are you going."

"I'm going to Arty warty's for a party, Commander Woot," Holly explained.

"Oh, ok" Root whispered. "By the way, have a raise."

"WOW, thanks Commander Woot," Holly shrieked. She then ran off making, it just in time to her shuttle.


	2. Of Injuries, Screaming and Crying

**A/N- Hello and welcome to the newly edited version of chapter 2 of OOCness! All I'm really doing is fixing the spelling and giving it paragraphs. ENJOY!**

Chapter Two

Injuries, Screaming, and Crying

Holly arrived at Artemis' place and knocked on the door so hard her wrist broke.

"OW!" she shrieked, falling to the ground, screaming and crying. Artemis opened the door, saw Holly on the ground and round in circles like a headless chicken screaming, "OMG, OMG, Holly wolly's hurt and now we can't have the birthday party and Holly wolly's crying and screaming and, and, and … OMG!"

After a couple of minutes of this Butler came out and said in a whiny voice, "All the screaming gave me a headache." He then sat down and started crying.

Eventually Holly's magic got tired of all the commotion and healed Holly's wrist. Holly stood up with a big goofy grin on her face and stopped Artemis mid circle with a huge hug. "Arty warty its sooooooo good to see you," she squealed.

"I missed you too Holly wolly," Artemis cried, returning the hug.

Butler sulked. "No one cares how Butler feels. No one cares at all but you, my precious." He picked up a teddy bear and stroked it repeatedly, crooning the words, 'my precious.'

"Hi Holly, Arty, and Butler," Foaly said, trotting out of the bathroom after everyone had walked inside. Toilet paper was stuck to one of his hooves and dragged out behind him.

"Foaly woaly," Holly squealed (again), "There's toilet paper stuck to your hoofy."

"WHAT!" Foaly screeched. "Where, where, get it off, get it off!" Foaly started having a full panic attack, running round in circles screaming, and crying. Eventually the toilet paper fell off and Foaly calmed down.

"Foaly woaly," Artemis cried, "I was so worried about you!" Foaly didn't respond because he was thanking God for saving his life.

"Let's play PARTY GAMES!" Holly shrieked.

"Oh wait for me," Juliet cried, running down the stairs. "Look everyone," she shrieked "I'm OOC!" Juliet danced around the room, celebrating her OOCness, till she realized no one was celebrating with her. They were all looking at their scripts.

"Juliet, you're not in this part," Holly explained.

"You're not even in the script," Foaly said, clearly annoyed.

"GET LOST!" Artemis yelled, grumpy because the author was forcing him to speak in baby talk.

Butler, however, looked confused. "Juliet, what's so OOC about you?" he asked.

"Well duh," she replied, "I dyed my hair bright pink!"

"Juliet," Artemis said, "You're not OOC enough and also you're not in the script. Please leave." So off Juliet stormed to her room.

"Should we get back to the party games?" Holly asked.

"No," Artemis replied.

"Why not?"

"The chapter's over."

"Oh."


	3. Of Ass's and Evil Laughs

**Disclaimer: I own **_**nothing.**_

CHAPTER 3

An Ass and Evil Laughs

Artemis, Butler, Holly, and Foaly were standing in the _huge _lounge room of Fowl Manor. Holly was chewing her nails, Artemis was putting a pair of pink boxers on his head, Butler was knitting an outfit for his teddy, and Foaly was picking his nose.

"I GOTS AN IDEA!" Holly screeched. Butler was so surprised he dropped a stitch and started crying.

"Let's play…" Holly paused dramatically and a drum-roll started up. "PIN THE TAIL ON THE CENTAUR!" Holly concluded. (Big word!)

"YAY!" Artemis yayed (!) He ran around the room cheering.

"But where are we going to get a centaur from?" Foaly asked. Holly pushed a mirror in front of him.

"Hey everyone look!" Foaly yelled. "I found a centaur!" Holly and Arty sweat-dropped.

"I know!" Artemis said, "Let's play pin the tail on the Foaly Woaly!"

"YAY!" Foaly yelled. "The games named after me!"

"That's right, Foaly Woaly," Holly said. "Now put this blindfold on and turn around." Foaly did as he was told. Holly giggled and Artemis pulled a _huge _pin out of nowhere. He then shoved it up Foaly's ass.

"!" Foaly screamed. "MY ASS!" Foaly ran around the room, breaking a vase, tripping over a lounge, and then slamming into a wall. Holly walked up to Foaly and ripped out the pin. "Wasn't that fun, Foaly Woaly?" She said. Artemis and Holly giggled evilly.

Foaly started crying. "My ass hurts," He whimpered. Butler walked up to Foaly and patted his shoulder comfortingly. "I understand," He said. He then had a little touchy feely of Foaly's ass. He grinned. "My precious…" He whispered, and laughed evilly. Foaly joined in hesitantly, wondering what was so funny.


	4. Of Spinning Bottles and Cake

**A/N- I own nothing bla, bla, bla. Lawyers leave me alone bla, bla, bla…**

**Chapter 4**

Spinning Bottles and Cake

"Arty warty," Holly whined, "When are you going to open your presents?"

"After cake!" Artemis yelled.

"But we already had cake," Holly whined.

"They haven't." Artemis said, pointing at Foaly and Butler.

Holly pouted. "Who cares about them?"

Artemis whispered into Holly's ear just as she was about to throw a tantrum. She listened then grinned evilly.

Butler and Foaly didn't notice; they were busy playing spin the bottle. Butler spun the bottle and it pointed at himself. "Ok," Butler said. "I dare myself to spend the rest of the day naked!" He stripped. Artemis noticed and also stripped (Oh yeah). Then he and Holly went into the kitchen. Strange noises were heard…

Butler spun the bottle and it landed on Foaly. "I dare you to kiss me!" Butler yelled.

"YAY!" Foaly yelled, and then French pashed him.

Holly and Artemis entered the room with two pieces of cake covered in red sauce.

"Butler wutler, Foaly woaly!" Artemis yelled, "Holly wolly and I made you cake."

"YAY!" Butler and Foaly yelled. They both grabbed a piece of cake and took a bite. A HUGE bite. Then their faces turned red. Smoke poured out of their ears.

"**OOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW"** They screamed. Fire flew out of their mouths and they started running around the house like headless chickens. They eventually found the pool and jumped in.

"POOL PARTY!" Holly screeched. She was about to jump in when Artemis stopped her.

"No clothes in my pool!"

So Holly stripped. Chix Verbil appeared out of nowhere. "Giggity giggity," he said, and then disappeared. Artemis also jumped in the pool and they all played Marco Polo happily ever after!

The end… or is it?


	5. Of Drowning and Presents

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not even the pool…**

Chapter 5

Of Drowning and Presents

Artemis, Holly, Butler, and Foaly were playing Marco Polo. Actually Artemis, Holly, and Foaly were playing Marco Polo, and Butler was drowning.

"Oh my God!" Butler yelled. "I'm drowning! Help me!"

Everyone ignored him.

Butler got out of the pool and went to sulk in a corner. If you listened carefully you could hear him muttering, "No one cares about Butler, only Golem cares about Butler." If you looked you would see Golem stroking Butler's head saying, "My precious. My shiny precious."

Back in the pool the others continued with their game of Marco Polo.

"Marco!" Artemis yelled.

"POLO!" Holly screeched into his ear. Artemis spun around and hugged her.

"I caught you Holly wolly!" he yelled.

"Yay!" Holly yelled. "I'm in!"

Holly got out of the pool and punched Butler. "Butler wutler!" she yelled, "You're in now!" Butler started crying.

Holly got back in the pool and she, Artemis, and Foaly swan around in circles yelling, "Polo!" every now and then.

After a couple of hours Artemis, Holly, and Foaly were still swimming in circles and Butler was still crying and Golem was still stroking Butler's shiny head. Holly was bored. She swam over to Artemis and yelled, "Arty warty I'm bored!"

"Okaly dokely, neighbour," Artemis said, "Let's go open presents."

"YAY!" Holly screeched. "PRESENT TIME!"

Holly jumped out of the pool. Once again, Chix Verbil appeared out of nowhere and said, "Giggitty giggitty!" Then Quagmire appeared out of nowhere and glared at Chix. "That's my line!" he said.

Chix and Quagmire glared at each other at each other for about an hour then decided to be the best of friends. They decided to go out and get totally drunk.

While Chix and Quagmire were glaring at each other, Artemis was opening presents.

"Ooh, ooh," Foaly oohed, "Open mine first!"

"Ok," Artemis said. He picked up the present and unwrapped it revealing a tiny, pink something.

"Uh," he said, "What is it?"

"It's my brain!" Foaly said.

"What do you do with it?" Artemis asked.

"I'm not sure," Foaly said. "Eat it?"

"Ok!" Artemis said. He ate the brain.

"Mine next!" Butler said.

"Ok," Artemis said. He opened the present and pulled out a sweater, and put it on. "Oooh," he said, "It's so soft!"

"Thank you," Butler said shyly, "I made it from the hair off my back."

"Awww," everyone said.

"What conditioner do you use?" Artemis asked.

"Pantene," Butler said.

"MINE NEXT!" Holly screeched.

YAY!" Artemis yelled. He picked up the present and opened it. Inside was some mushy brown stuff.

"TADA!" Holly yelled. "I got you crap!"

"Yay!" Artemis yelled. "My favourite!" He hugged all his friends.

"Thank you Holly wolly, Butler wutler, and Foaly woaly," he said. "This was the bestest birthday party EVER!"

**The End. No, seriously. But if you want I could write a sequel…**


End file.
